i was not abused,abandoned,or locked up as a child.
my parents were not alcoholics,nor were they ever divorced.
we did not live in poverty,or in misery,or in an exotic country,
i am not a misunderstood genius,a former child celebrity,or the child of celebrity.
i am not a drug addict,sex addict,but food addict,(bhaaa)or recovered anything.if i indeed had a past life,i have no recollection of who i was.
i have not survived against all odds.
i have not lived to tell.
i have not witnessed the extraordinary.
this is my story.
jiwa yang sempurna perlu pengorbanan.
aku perlu kau kekaseh,jiwa,teman dan segala.
menjemput untuk rasa gembira waktu ni payah.
sebetolnya kau pergi kerna aku yang tak memahami?
begitu?
seperti meluat dengan diri.
oh kenapakah?
aku begitu perlu begini.
goddamn it!!
sehalus org minta aku berpositif,
tapi setelah itu macammacam .
*****waaaaaaaa:(( sobsob...iskiskisk.
sedih betoi!
selangkah kalau aku sudah pergi dan tamahu toleh lagi,aku minta maaf.
itu hidop.
buatpa nak toleh untuk ke beribu kali,kalau sekalipon tak menyebelahi.
shut the fuck up,oh lullaby.
i think of u every night and day.
you took my heart,then
you took my pride away,
i hate myself for loving you.
can't break free from the thing you do,
i wanna walk away,but i feel like i wanna run back to you.
i really hate myself for loving you.
damn!
sedih betol bila jadi manusia bernama atiqah!
entry aku asyik bikin org meluat.
tapi aku dah penat simpan dalamdalam.
dah taktahu mahu buang mane.
saya kadangkadang kan awak penat juga mentelaah hidop.
cari balik mana silap,dah jumpa tapi lerai dan selesai.
tetap tak jadi apa.
oh cik bintang,
oh inche bulan.
di mana kalian membisu.
bungkam saya memikir jalan mencari kerdipan paling agung.
buleh saya lena puas malam ini.
sebab jiwa dah ditampal plaster cap diri sendiri.
dah mula merepek-kan bukan bukan.
baik saya duduk diamdiam
dan berhidop dengan baik.
bukan begitu mr & ms penasehat.
please don't tell me not to cry
please don't say there was a reason why
you don't know what i am feeling
or how much i hurt
the wet spots are from tears on the collar of the shirt
you think i should go on with life
forget about it and be strong!yeahh
but deep down i am sad
and i don't want to go along
i don't expect you to understand why
for no apparent reason i break down and start to cry
and that is why i am not acting like the same old me
i will never be the same again
not today not tomorrow
but never.
the best thing you can do for me,
just be there
just like always
my friends,my broken heart hurting bad,
and it will never mend.
biar celaka perasaan ini.
saya akur.
akan ada satu yang itu nanti.
amen.
p/s: pada mereka yang pernah tercalar luka kerna tingkah aku yang tak berbudi pekerti indah,aku minta maaf kalian.sungguh !
